InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "I'll go home with bonnie jean"

If I ever go on tour again after this current tour with Zeke, I will never again want to sleep in a tiny, uncomfortable bunk. No, that is no longer for me. I slept like a baby last night despite the fact that we were driving from San Diego to Boise. With the success of Zeke's album, and the insistence that we be able to bring our animals, the record label sprung for THE most amazing tour bus EVER. Hands down. We have a bed. An actual bed. And it is comfortable. I would say its almost as comfortable as our bed at home, but thats just not true. Nothing is more comfortable than our bed at home.

In case you couldn't tell, we are on tour. Tonight is the first show. Actually its MY first show on this tour. Zeke and crew have been doing this for a while, I've just joined the fun train. I'm not going to lie I'm nervous about this whole thing. I don't understand how I can become this whole other person on film, smile and look pretty and speak in front of huge audiences (for short periods of time of course) but performing in front of (what will apparently be sold out) audiences makes my stomach queasy and my knees go weak. I find I have a hard time breathing. But there is something about it that makes me keep coming back to it. I don't think I would ever do this on my own, but knowing that Zeke is there gives me a boost of confidence. Knowing he is there allows me to open myself up to complete strangers, especially when I'm singing things off of No Apologies. At some point during my set I find that I lose track of everything and everyone and just feel. After the last tour, at the very end, Zeke found out from one of the crew that after I got off stage I would lock myself in the bathroom and cry. I mean, huge, ugly sobs. I don't know if that will happen this time, but it was such an outlet, something I couldn't control, something my mind and body apparently needed to do.

The tour comes at the end of our honeymoon. I wish we were still on our honeymoon. We have been in Costa Rica since the end of October. I know Zeke has already given a run down of the most amazing place on earth. there was talk of never leaving. There was talk of buying a house there. But honestly, I wouldn't want a house. I would just want a hut. A thatched roof hut with hammocks and a feather mattress. I don't even care if that's not a realistic wish, but it would be perfect. To hide out in a place that is easy to hide in. We spent every moment together. I know, I know. But Dylan you already spend every moment together. But I swear this was different. It was just us and the ocean. No one knew us. No one could find us. I liked it like that. We spend most of our lives in front of people, with people screaming for us, wanting to see us. To just be alone together was refreshing.

Zeke showed you some of the pictures he took. He really has an eye with that camera of his. Of course he tried (and succeeded) to take tons of pictures of me, some of which are SO not appropriate. For anyone. Not even me. Okay maybe THAT'S not entirely true, but they're for no one else to see. I did, however, happen manage to steal his camera and took these: